Wow... Who knew

that listening to songs could be so depressing.

I downloaded Top 100 Pop Love Songs the album and listened to it.

When i listen to an album, my first job is going through each and every single song, and deleting those that i don't like. (automatically deleted Beatles/Bee Gees or some other oldies singer because i just can't stand the quality)

So, i started at, what, 2 pm. Abt 12 hours later, im at song 88. (i've deleted abt 60 songs thus far. yeah im uber picky.)

And im starting to feel damn bloody depressed. When you're a guy out of love, listening to hundreds of weird guys/gals crooning about lost love or succesful love or how they want to "make love" to me just feels really terrible. As Ricky Martin sang in this album, Nobody Wants To Be Lonely. Coming from the guy who was "livin la vida loca (living the crazy life)" It's abit hard to believe he's lonely, but what he sang sums it up nicely for me.

Feeling so depressed.

I edited my friendster profile tonight. There is a section that is "Who do you want to meet?" or something like that. Previously, i wrote "The love of my life."

Now i wrote.."Having gone through quite a bit of pain and failure, i'd say i'm just looking for someone who is content with what i am."

The honest truth is this, i can't stand it anymore. i share a room with my brother and every night before he sleeps, he'll talk to his gf on the phone and tell her abt his day's exciting dangerous work (he's a narcotics officer. Rendering his degree in banking obsolete)

My sister's getting married next week. I'm helping her as well as my future bro-in-law pick out their dress/tux respectively.

my best buddies from sec sch, one by one is getting attached or in the process of gettin attached.

Everytime i see a couple on the road, especially a particularly close couple (i'm lookin at you, sean), i feel a twinge of jealousy.

And the truth is, i cant take it. I long for there to be a special one. A dedicated someone that i can take care of and whom will take care of me unconditionally.

Nobody wants to be lonely.