The lack of a purpose.

Throughout my life, i have, on many many occasions, felt worthless, as though my existence was pointless. Today, however, was possible THE day when everything that i have felt was confirmed. i AM worthless.

I couldnt do anything at all today. I sat and watched in amazement at my teamamtes as joyhan explained the theory of the problem to them, and as i listened, i realised, i couldn't understand him.

Resigned to the fact that i couldnt understand others, i took out my pen and paper and tried to work it out on my own. But i failed to do so, time and time again.

In the end, all i had to present was the flowchart. THE FLOWCHART! It's like going up there and saying "good afternoon, we're team 4, and today's problem is blah blah blah." and then, the end. Sure, it seemed funny at first, but it really kinda sucks knowing that you can't do anything. Especially because i was a team-transfer. on team-transfer days, i always feel a need to do better, but i sucked. and let down the people who wanted me there.

I think shi min took pity on me and gave me a small calculation segment, and i thank her for that. I hope that one day, i might be able to redeem myself, but right now, sorry shi min, lucien, wei liang and elaine.